Monday, March 19, 2012

Chiedu Crystal

Ya know, up until this last January when I was in West Virginia and got to spend time with you I honestly just thought of you as my littlest sister; nothing less and nothing more. I knew that obviously you were your own person with feelings, ideas and a voice. But I didn't realize to what extent you had already grown up and become somewhat of an adult. I think the hardest part for me was realizing that even though you are 4 years younger than me you're not a baby. I was thrown off to see how damn opinionated and stubborn you could be, and how mature a lot of your words and actions were.


Growing up it always seemed to be me and Ahia closer together, and then you and Ob. Ahia and I did almost everything together growing up closer in age, we for sure had our differences but as we got older we became closer than ever; at times we were the best of friends & the worst of enemies (that just comes with the territory of being sisters). Ob and I have always had a connection (I think its because we're the brownest ones in the family, and the best looking duh).
But you and I... I'm just not sure how to explain it. We've forever had a relationship but it was more of an oldest sister: youngest sister one. We weren't close, but we were not not close (makes tons of sense, I know).
 I've always had a tremendous amount of love for you and protection over you and still do, but I grew a greater sense of admiration for you at Ahia's funeral when you gave your talk. During one of the most saddest times of my life you brought reassurance, smiles and a little bit of laughter not only to my heart but to the hearts of all those in the chapel. Your talk was amazing and the reason I knew I would be okay and have strength to carry on was because I saw how strong you were being, and I could only imagine how much you depend on your older siblings in comparison to how much I was depending on you. I knew I had no choice but to be strong for our family, and set a good example of how to deal with the loss of our beloved sister. You Chiedu, have the biggest heart, you care so much about all things (especially cats) and are so honest in your everyday life (even at Olive Garden when our waitress forgot to add our desert to the bill, I was all for free desert but you HAD to tell her...we got it free anyways & that goes to show honesty is the best policy).
March 16, 2012 marked your 18 years of living on this fun, crazy, hectic earth and I was glad to be able to wish you a Happy Birthday. I can't believe you are 18 years young; legal to all the boys barking up your tree, no more curfew, and now you can do one of the best things Americans have the chance to do... VOTE! (the coolest thing EVERRRRRRRRRRR ;) I don't feel much older standing next to you and Ob considering you both tower over me, but I do know my brain holds more wisdom and experience (not to toot my own horn). If I have been one thing in your lives I hope it is a good example of a bad example. I want you both to learn from my mistakes so that you'll NEVER have to go through some of the things I have endured. I know you're smarter than me already (sometimes...lets not get ahead of ourselves), and I just wish the best for you. I am so proud and excited for you to soon be a student at West Virginia University, congratulations again. I see big things for you in your future, and cannot wait to be apart of all the amazing things you accomplish.
 Excited for you to be an aunt, you're going to be great and she's going to love ya! I love you too silly girl, hope you love this blog (I know you've been anticipating it) Happy 18 years of living, and many more to come. Thanks for being a big inspiring part of my life.

Tuesday, March 13, 2012

Obike David

Happy
Day of Birth
baby brother!!!
I love you so much, and I am so proud of the 19 year old boy you have grown to be. Even though right now you're not the happiest with me, I know you will get over it and we'll be besties again. It's crazy to me how independent, smart, and oh so very opinionated you have become.

       I remember like it was yesterday you being smaller than all of us girls, so skinny, fragile and little that we all ran the house. Now you're a whopping 6"4 275lbs of almost grown man. It's definitely you who runs sh!t now..Who would have known such a BIG boy would come from such little parents especially dad who on his best day is 5"5! 




Whatever the case you are the most handsome brother, and my favorite one at that ;) Thank you for being so strong, and such a stable rock for me to always call and depend on. Your opinion means so much to me and I value a lot of what you have to say. Although we may not always agree, just know you hold such a special place in my heart.

 I can't wait for you to be an uncle, I know you're going to be her favorite. I also can't wait to see you go on your mission and accomplish ALL the things you have planned. I know you will go far in life and achieve everything you've ever wanted to. It's not going to be easy, but you're huge and can tackle any obstacle in your way... I just know it.
When you get older birthdays just become another day, for me when I turned 20 I cried, when I turned 18 I didn't go to school because I didn't want to be "old". Well now I am 22 and only getting older. On my 20th birthday Dad told me it is a privilege to gain another year because not everyone gets the opportunity and also because it means you are 1 year wiser than you were the year before. At first I was like yeah, yeah (in one ear, out the other) but after these past couple years I realized he is 100% right. You're still technically a teen ager so it might not apply to you just yet, but one day you'll get it. Thank you for being the strong, big-hearted, silly, stubborn, smart brother you are. I love you in such abundant amounts that it's hard to express in words how much love I actually have for you. You're amazing keep up the good hard work, it will all be worth it! We are all so proud of you, and wish you only the best. I love you and happy 19th birthday!


Patience is a Virtue

They (whoever "they" are) say "Good things come to those who wait", I've grown to realize that this is so true. Either that or God likes to keep me at the edge of my seat at all times, leading me to think the worst like nothing is going to work out or I will run out of time. But just when things are boiling down, and I am at the end of my rope, exhausted all of my resources He is there with an answer. It is an extreme test of faith; and I have to admit my faith has come and gone when times got really tough. But with the love, support, and inspiring words of family and friends I was able to regain my faith and not worry so much because I knew I had a great support group and a Heavenly Father who wouldn't allow me to go without. Months ago I didn't think I would have made it to where I am now and have made the progress that I have made. For example I remember being 6 weeks pregnant, scared, confused, nervous, happy, mad, sad, freaked out, overwhelmed, petrified, excited, in disbelief, feeling shocked (and that was just my mood changes in 5 minutes) not thinking I would ever make it to 37 weeks with a big ol' belly, and if somehow, someway I did I did not think I would be here as fast as I got here. I would be lying if I said I couldn't picture myself doing something else, but I am very content with where I am. I am proud of who and how strong I have become, it hasn't been easy by any means but it has most certainly been worth it. A lot of the things I was worried about not working have honestly worked themselves out and just in time. The last thing was an apartment for Mike and I to bring our daughter home to, again I thought nothing was going to work out and that was probably because I wasn't seeing immediate results. But as of this morning we were approved and are ready for move in whenever! With a big thanks to my parents for making it possible, we FINALLY have a place of our own that we can bring baby home to and it feels amazing for that stress just to be lifted clear off my chest. Cutting it a little close... but better late than never!


Even though he doesnt look happy to even be sitting
next to me, I know the love is there. Thank You Daddy!
We butt heads because we are so alike, but you have
always had the best intentions for your kids. Without
your efforts I wouldn't be where I am today.
Love you lil guy, proud of how hard you work to support
your family. I plan to do the same.

I think we look like twins here, I also  think  KNOW
she is the most beautiful Mother
God could bless any family with and I am so
thankful for her in my life. I love you mother dearest, Thank you so much for ALL your help. I promise I will make it up to you with your own big house and nice car/truck, and that is a promise!<3


Tuesday, March 6, 2012

Baby Daddy


Where do I begin!? Let's see... I'm going to start with saying this has been one bumpy roller coaster ride that I don't think either of us had planned for when hopping in. However I must say that I am pleased with how far we've both come and where it looks as though we are headed. I know I haven't been the easiest girl to love this past year, but I'm sure you can imagine why. Since we've been together it seems as though it has just been one thing after the other, literally. Neither of us have really been able to just sit back and catch our breath for 5 minutes before another thing is thrown our way. But for those reasons exactly I know we will be okay, and I have faith that we will make it clear to the moon and back.


"True love does not come by finding the perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly."
I think it's pretty safe to say that is damn near right on for you and I. It has been very difficult at times, but when push came to shove, you nor I left each others side. I want to thank you again, and just let it be known how much I appreciate you being the shoulder and rock for me to lean on when things got REALLY tough (you know what I'm referring to). You and your family especially your mom helped me in ways I can't really put into words. Just know that I am forever grateful for you both. I have grown so fond of your entire family, and I have Christmas to thank for that. Also thank you for not allowing my stubborn ways to get the best of that holiday, I had a lot of fun and felt nothing but love.

Baby... we're going to have a baby!!! How crazy is that. And she is well on her way, which by the way you need to get your butt out here. I refuse to push unless you're right next to me holding my hand. This of all things was most unexpected, but in hindsight I think this is just the right thing for us both to get us both at this point in our lives where we see the true value of life. It's time to grow up suga, ready or not! I have faith in us, and honestly can't wait to have our little family of 3. I am also glad that it's going to be with you. I day dream all the time about you holding our daughter, how much she's going to love and depend on her daddy. You're going to be great, I just know it. You have such a big heart and I can't wait for this gorgeous little girl of ours to have you wrapped around her little finger ;)
 With that being said I want you to know how proud I am of you for who you are today. I want to thank you again for being so patient with me and my mood swings (cooking a baby isn't easy, and has taken a toll on my body AND mind). I appreciate you baring with me. I also want to thank you for being so okay with moving to a completely different state to be with me and raise our child. I love you forever for that.
I know we did things a little unorthodox but I did have my palm read with Ahia a couple years back and she did tell me that I would have 1 child out of wedlock (we thought that b!tch was crazy, she obviously didn't know who my dad was telling me I was gonna have a baby before I was married, pshhh). But little did I know she was actually right on. I think this will (and already has) made us tons stronger both as individuals and as a couple, not to mention the distance has made me grow much fonder ;) jk i love ya. But for reals, I think things happened this way for a reason and I hope you plan to spend the rest of your life with me like I do with you.
I can't wait to see and kiss your face off everyday, and just having you around will make me feel safer and secure. Can't wait to see you holding our baby girl, really I just can't wait to spend everyday loving and growing with you for the rest of forever. I love you Michael Zachary Evans, your heart is safe with me.

Monday, March 5, 2012

Ahiadike Carrie

My world came crashing down on the night of Friday June 24, 2011. It was a gloomy day to begin with, but as the night wore on it began to rain so hard almost as if God was crying. I will forever remember where I was, who I was with and how I stayed up all night praying and asking God why. Why her? Why my family? Pleading for a second chance for us all, swearing I would never do another bad thing ever if he just let my sister be okay. By the grace of some of the amazing friends I have encountered, I made it to her bedside to hold her hand, kiss her forehead, tell her how sorry I was, how much I loved her and finally... say goodbye.

 Life is not fair. But what I have taken from this tragedy is how much love and support my family and I have from everyone who reached out in our time of anger, sadness and heartache. I truly believe it has strengthened the bond in my family, brought us closer and taught us to NEVER take anyone or anything for granted. Though nothing will ever be the same without her in our lives, we haven't a choice but to move forward and keep going in our own lives. Keeping her in our prayers and thoughts letting her know she will forever be in our hearts and never once forgotten.

 It has been said that God has a funny way of giving and taking. In my life this would be completely accurate; about 4 weeks after my beloved sister passed away I went to the doctors because I was feeling sick with a cold in August and in need of a doctors note to excuse me from the work I had missed and possibly to be excused from work for the rest of the week (work sucks!). On August 4th, 2011 Mike and I found out I was indeed pregnant. To the doctors calculations I was close to if not 4 weeks along in my first trimester. The timing was impeccable, and a marching band of 1000 people could not have screamed in my face any louder that this was indeed a work of God, and Ahia blessing my life and the life of my family with a beautiful baby girl. Although the hole in our hearts will never be completely mended God knew we needed something to fulfill our hearts until we got to see Ahia again.


I can't thank either the Big Guy upstairs and/or my baby sister enough for allowing such a miracle into my life and to help lead me in the direction I am headed now. I so would not have seen myself where I am now a year ago, but I can't begin to express how grateful I am for how things did turn out. It breaks my heart to know that my best friend, my right hand, left leg, my rock won't be right by my side to physically hold my hand through the toughest, scariest, biggest most joyful moment in my life. But I am comforted to know you are looking down, watching over us all holding Gods hand. Hope I make you proud :)
  <3

Maternity Pictures

It was a cold and windy Thursday afternoon when I got a little taste of what real life, every day models do for a living. With a big thanks to jordan mCcall photography we conquered a very successful Maternity photo shoot! It was both our first time; me being professionally photographed while pregnant and McCall photographing a pregnant chick. I must say she is amazing at what she does, and I'm so thankful! They turned out awesome and I cannot wait for little miss to get here so I can dress her up and McCall can capture more precious moments.



"Mommy Instincts"



So, I am less than 4 weeks away from my special delivery and my mommy instincts have already kicked in at full force. My baby girl hasn't even made her grand entrance yet and I already want to protect her from the world!

Hence my reason for making a blog; it's just a more private place to post pictures and updates compared to Facebook and all the many creepers on there. She is already such a special part of my life I only want to share her with the special people that matter :)